Travel News

A Dozen Ways To Die Down Under: How I Survived My Australian Vacation

Locations in this article:  Sydney, Australia

A Dozen Ways To Die Down Under: How I Survived My Australian VacationBetween crocodiles, deadly jellyfish, and seven of the world’s most poisonous snakes, an Australian vacation isn’t always for the faint of heart.

The Virtuous Traveler Leslie Garrett set out to test her luck in the land down under.

My guide Jason says it’s a statistical likelihood that my Australian adventure will be my last. Anywhere.

I’m traveling in a group in a minibus led by Jason. We’re going from Daintree Rainforest to Cape Tribulation, the site of Captain Cook’s own trials.

As he drives, Jason shares terrifying stories––the fisherman eaten by a croc, the swimmer eaten by a croc, the many thousands bitten by snakes, and the person who died by box jellyfish sting.

“Within 5 minutes, you’ll be dead,” he concludes, “And in those last 5 minutes, death can’t come quickly enough.”

Inevitably, Jason says that those killed were being stupid and were likely drunk. I look around at my fellow travelers, who, like me, have blanched somewhat. I feel stupid for having underestimated Australia’s danger. With my love of Australian wine, there’s a distinct possibility that at some point during this trip, I’ll wind up drunk.

Cape Tribulation, Queensland, Australia - Doesn't Look Deadly - photo by Leslie GarrettI’m in Queensland, which had its own deadly experiences with flash floods in early 2011, and then the Yasi Cyclone a month later.

First on my agenda is Daintree. At 150 million years old, Daintree is the world’s oldest surviving rainforest. It’s home to more rare and endangered plant and animal species than anywhere else. After the Amazon, it’s the second largest tract of virgin rainforest in the world.

And … it’s ripe with things that want to kill me.

There’s the aptly named Idiot Fruit, one of the most rare flowering plants on the planet with an apple-like fruit that’s highly poisonous. One quarter of the fruit is enough to kill you, since it’s packed with deadly cyanide and alkaloids, a chemical group that includes nicotine, cocaine and morphine. Always pack a Clif Bar when visiting the Daintree Rainforest because 70 percent of the fruit is toxic.

We took the Discovery Centre’s Canopy Tower tour of the Daintree, which lifts you high into the trees with a companion audio tour.

Below, one can sometimes spot a cassowary. The endangered ostrich-like birds might look comical with their prehistoric crests, bright blue heads and red wattles, but they were cited by Guinness World Records as the planet’s deadliest bird. The males are notoriously protective and won’t hesitate to use their powerful legs and sharp nails to make you back off.

Wild animals you’ll be happy to see in Australia: Swimming With Wild Dolphins In Rockingham, Western Australia

Baby Crocodile In The Wild, Australia - photo by Leslie GarrettFortunately, the only cassowary I see is behind bars at Port Douglas’ Wildlife Habitat.

There I also see an estuarine crocodile, yet another creature who feasts on tourists.

I see plenty of crocs while in at the Wildlife Habitat and at the Australia Zoo made famous by “Crocodile Hunter” Steve Irwin, and, once, in the wild …

Next, I visit Cape Tribulation, or Cape Trib, as it’s colloquially known. It gets its name from Captain James Cook.

After hitting two nearby reefs in one day, Cook noted in his log in 1770 that this particular spot was where all his troubles began.

It’s a stunning spot with blindingly white beaches and turquoise warm water, which the signs warn us from entering.

The box jellyfish is the deadliest creature on earth.

Even though most beaches in Northeastern Australia are netted off during jellyfish season, they are frequently vacant with no one in the water.

Learn more about the region: Australia & New Zealand Travel section

Crocodile Warnings Abound In Australia - photo by Leslie GarrettFew want to take a chance with the creature whose stings National Geographic describes as “so overpoweringly painful, human victims have been known to go into shock and drown or die of heart failure before even reaching shore. Survivors can experience considerable pain for weeks and often have significant scarring where the tentacles made contact.”

We decide to stay on shore.

Two days later, we seem to be in safer territory.

Having traveled south to Noosa, I booked a lesson in the famed surfing beach.

By now, I’m thoroughly cautious. Pulling on my surf shirt, I eye the water. “Crocs? Box jellyfish?” I venture. Nope. Water is too cold.

I scan the horizon for Idiot Fruit trees, cassowaries or snakes. Nothing. Whew. I Velcro my ankle rope to my board and relax. Surfing is a blast.

Over lunch, I share my newfound passion. A local overhears. “You were surfing in Noosa?” he asks.

“Yep,” I reply.

“Wow,” he says, “haven’t you heard about the bull sharks? Ate a surfer last year…”

Text and photos by Leslie Garrett for PeterGreenberg.com. Leslie Garrett is an award-winning journalist and author of The Virtuous Consumer: Your Essential Shopping Guide for a Better, Kinder, Healthier World. Visit her at www.virtuousconsumer.com.

Related articles: